Park Rangers Just Can't Believe Their Ears Sometimes!
Take a Look at Some of The Most Outrageous Questions Asked By Campers and Tourists!

"Sir...Is that the biggest snake that you have ever caught"?




Here are questions that park rangers have been asked by campers and hikers, along with some quotations and actual comments left on Forest Service registration sheets and on the comment cards.

"The places where trails do not exist are not marked well."
"Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands."
"The coyotes made too much noise last night and kept me awake. Please eradicate these annoying animals."
"Reflectors need to be placed on trees every 50 feet so people can hike at night with flashlights."
"Found a smoldering cigarette left by a horse."
"Do we end up in the same place we started?"
Does the river follow the canyon the whole way down?"
"Need more signs to keep area pristine."
"Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill."
"Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals."
"Too many bugs spiders and spider webs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests."
"Escalators would help on steep uphill sections."
"Chairlifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them."
"A Starbucks would be nice at the trailhead."
"A small raccoon came into my camp and stole my bag of potato chips. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call."
"Please pave the trails so they can be plowed of snow in the winter."
"Instead of a permit system or regulations, the Forest Service needs to reduce worldwide population growth to limit the number of visitors to wilderness.



These questions were actually posed to park rangers at different parks; these park rangers are still laughing!

Banff National Park:
Is that food coloring in the lakes?"
"When did you build the glaciers?"
"How much for a moose?"
"Where are the igloos?"
"How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the Elk Crossing signs?"
"At what elevation does an elk become a moose?"
"Are the bears with collars tame?"
"Is there anywhere I can see the bears pose?"
"Is it ok to keep an open bag of bacon on the picnic table, or should I store it in my tent?"
"Where can I find Alpine Flamingos?"
"Where does Alberta end and Canada begin?"
"How far is Banff from Canada?"
"What's the best way to see Canada in a day?"
"When we enter British Columbia, do we have to convert our money to British pounds?"
"Where can I buy a raccoon hat? All Canadians own one, don't they?"
"Are there phones in Banff?"
"So it's eight kilometers away. Is that in miles?"
"Is that two kilometers by foot or by car?"
"Did I miss the turnoff for Canada?"

Carlsbad Caverns National Park
"How much of the cave is underground?"
"So what's in the unexplored part of the cave?"
"Does it ever rain in here?"
"How many gallons of water will this hold?"
"Is this part of area 51?""Could the aliens still be living in here?"
"So what is this just a hole in the ground?"
"What happens if the lights go out?"
"Will my cell phone work down there?"
"Did the person that found this find his way out?"
"It would be nice if you had grass growing in here."

Everglades National Park
"When they shed do you use their skins for belts and shoes?"
"Will they really eat dogs?"
"Are the alligators real?"
"What time does the three o'clock bus leave?"
"Are the baby alligators for sale?"
"Where are the rides?"
"Who feeds all of the alligators?"
"Do they migrate south in the winter?"
"Will they eat out of your hand?"
"Do they do any tricks?"

Grand Canyon National Park
"Are we below sea level here?"
"If I would have known there were this many rocks in the Grand Canyon, I would have never come on this trip."
"Do you light it up at night?"
"Can these life jackets get wet?"
"How thick are the canyon walls?"
"I bought tickets for the elevator to the bottom -- where is it?"
"Why did Lake Powell form on that side of Glen Canyon Dam instead of this side?"
Since we left camp this morning, have we gained elevation or lost elevation?"
"If you stutter will the echo stutter as well?"
"So where are the faces of the presidents?"
"Is the mule train air conditioned?"
"So is that Canada over there?"
Was this man-made?"

Mesa Verde National Park
"Did people build this, or did Indians?"
"Did the Indians like to ski?"
"Why did they build the ruins so close to the road?"
"Do you know of any undiscovered ruins?"
"Why did the Indians decide to live in Colorado?"

Yellowstone National Park
Does Old Faithful erupt at night?"
"Do you put the animals away at night?"
"How do you keep it filled with water?"
"In the winter will it freeze?"
"How do you turn it on?"
"Is that where the bears take a bath?"
"Has anyone every scuba dived into it to see how it works?"
"If you sat on it how high would it send you up into the air?"
"When does the guy who turns it on get to sleep?"

Yosemite National Park
"Where are the cages for the animals?"
"What time of year do you turn on Yosemite Falls?"
"What happened to the other half of Half Dome?
"Is there an elevator to the top of the dome"
"Can you see San Francisco from the top of the dome?"
"Can I get a picture taken with the carving of President Clinton?
"Are chipmunks just squirrels with stripes?"
" Where was the last Bigfoot seen?"
"If I find gold do I get to keep it?"
"Why did they build this park so far away from town?"
"How did they get covered wagon through here?"
"Why do marshmallows taste better when they are cooked over a campfire?"
"What happens to the people who fall of off the dome?"


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